This post is dedicated to all aspie children who just defy the idea of stepping into the tub or shower to clean themselves. I have dealt with this issue since my son was 2 and now approaching 15 we have come so far. I do not want to say it will take this long for you as if I had some of this knowledge in the years prior we probably would have accomplished this task a long time ago. In a nutshell, you would think it was world war III when it came to be bath time. I am still surprised to this day that no one ever called the police on us with the screaming from my child when he would step his big toe into the water followed by
resistance to sitting down into the tub. A few years back after finally getting him to sit in the tub and giving him directions on how to wash himself (I am guessing he was 11 years old) I left him alone hoping he would do the job all by himself and be done with it. I heard him running the water while I was in the other room but he seemed to be doing fine so I went on with my business in cleaning up the house. I go in to check on him about 15 mins later and OMG - no where to be found was Noah's Ark but I had gallons and gallons of water on my floor and bubbles bursting over the top of the tub. Knowing I did not have any bubble bath I took a deep breath and in the most calmly voice asked what happened in here. He was in his own world and it took a few times to get his attention. Rolling up my jeans so I am not knee deep in water (well not really but almost) I calmly asked What happened in here and where did all these bubbles come from? (As I completed that sentence I see my body wash bottle is completely empty) As he catches the bubbles that are flying in the air he responds: "Mom, did you know bubbles are made up of air surrounded by a thin film of water which traps the air in it." I respond "Wow, I never knew that" - trying to keep the mood in the room as pleasant as possible. He then follows through with: "Did you know the biggest bubble ever blown could have held over 750 gallons of water". (In my mind I am calculating that is probably how much I have on my floor). OK - the whole purpose of this was to get my son clean not learn facts but it didn't surprise me for him to past this information onto me. The biggest surprise of all was He Was Clean even his toes and fingers were wrinkled which told me he sat in the tub long enough! (Except for his hair which at this time I am still doing for him). The light went on - he will take a bath with bubbles and get clean.
At this age of 11 he still had his bath toys which he happily played with. I did not have a concern in the world that at this age he still needs to play in tub as long as he was getting clean. I did find out using a wash cloth is still the best method of actually cleaning the body as the scrubbies always 'hurt' him. Even the softest ones out there caused problems at this age. Slowly over time we would just do a leg or arm with the scrubby and eventually he was using a scrubby to do his whole body.
To sum it up:
Set a time and be consistent that bath will take place a few times each week. During the summer it is easier as swimming can replace it until he/she feels more comfortable in the tub. Still to this day he knows he must be going in for his shower at 7pm each night. He has no electronics if he does not go in for his shower by this time. His reward is back on the computer for an hour if he initiated the bath/shower on his own.
Make bath time fun (no matter the age of the child). My son loves frogs so of course bath toys included plenty of these. I now have bubble bath on hand.
Goggles: This is the only way he would go swimming in the pool so why not allow it in the tub. It keeps the water out of the eyes and helps when it comes time to wash hair.
Charts: This never helped my son but many swear by showing the steps needed to wash the body and laminate the chart so it stays dry.
Slowly introduce the shower: With goggles donned and a soap lathered boy, I would have him stand up and I would direct the shower over his body to rinse off the soap. We then introduced the shower to just wash trunk of body and allow him to sit in the water for the remainder of the bath. Continue to add parts of the body that will be washed and rinsed. Eventually it came time when he had to shower completely then sit in the bath and enjoy bath time.
Add Music: Just this year (at 14) he received speakers so he can listen to his iPod while showering. I do not think his bath toys have been touched in over a month. He is enjoying his shower more now and actually goes in on a regular basis without being told to. This is just music to my ears when I hear the shower going and he is not to be found.
It will come a time when you do not need to worry anymore. There maybe setbacks when you need to start over again with step by step instructions. Just be sure you are consistent with the rules, use the same prompts and procedures. Be patient and remember to give positive feedback and lots and lots of praise and encouragement.
Let's face the challenges of raising an Asperger's child together. Chat or leave a comment.
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Personal Hygiene and the Asperger's Child
A common behavior characteristic in Aspergers kids is the dislike of grooming and personal hygiene habits. Aspies of all ages seem to have difficulty establishing sound hygiene routines in the areas of bathing/showering, brushing hair, changing clothes, haircuts, cleaning teeth and washing hair. You are probably wondering "Where do I begin to get this all under control?". Honestly it is a step by step process and you will not accomplish it all within a week or a few months. I will not explain why the aspie child has problems in this area as that can be found anywhere you look on the web. I want to keep each post short and sweet and how we as a TEAM worked together to overcome each obstacle.
This series of blogs will attempt to gear you in the right direction. It is what I have done and although we are far from being there we are slowly getting to that point. I will list each one below and as I have a post written I will enter the link so you can follow up on it. Please add your suggestions cause what works for one might not work for another and who knows, I might find the missing link that will help my son overcome his difficulties with you sharing how you got your child to improve on his personal hygiene.
My darling son is going to be 15 and I think our biggest obstacle right now is still with brushing teeth. So that will be probably the last post I write about in this series as we are still working on it. I want to start with showering as this has been a battle in itself since he was 2 years old. I like to say I no longer need to remind him it's time for a shower and I will share in my post - Personal Hygiene (Bathing/Showering) on how we accomplished this. Sit back and enjoy and visit often as I work on this series.
Upcoming Post in regards to Personal Hygiene with the Aspie Child:
Bathing/Showering - washing all body parts -[Click here to read this post]
Washing Hair {post forthcoming}
Changing Clothes {post forthcoming}
Haircuts {post forthcoming}
Brushing Teeth {post forthcoming}
Feel free to email me any questions/comments and I will answer them within a day as my email is checked on a daily basis or leave a comment below.
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autism,
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personal hygiene,
sensitivity issue,
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Saturday, January 12, 2013
Can I Continue Blogging? Challenge Me!
Jan 2013 - We all make resolutions come the new year - but how many of us actually keep them. I am guilty for one - maybe I should make a new year's resolution that says I will not break any of my resolutions. This is why I titled this one can I continue. I need to devote once a week to this blog. It definitely isn't that I have nothing to say -- as this past year (2012) was full of exciting and also disappointing news/happenings. I just have trouble finding the time to post. I would love to get my followers back to visiting my blog and I guess the best way to do it is to become more active in keeping this blog.
This weekend I will try -- I said try -- to find some time to write about some cool happenings over the past year. They are etched in my mind and if I get them down in here I am sure you and the next person will want to bookmark/feed this blog to keep coming back to see what happens next.
Parenting my asperger's child (no longer is Asperger's in the DSM-5 - as it was removed as a disorder and "collapsing" it under the autism spectrum disorders.) is still the main blog - I kind of like keeping it separate and having a name to my son's disorder -- My blog's title just could not be: Parenting my Autistic Spectrum Disorder Child. ha ha.
Some very near future blogs:
Ways I learned to calm my child during a rage in 10 minutes or less
Getting you child involved socially even if he/she has no friends
Introducing new foods
Personal Hygiene (this is still a very hot topic in our household but we are getting there)
High School and the Asperger's Child
How to Get Siblings to Understand
Career Goals beyond High School - start now don't wait
Asperger's - Outside View Looking In ---> My son's blog
Bear with me as I have a feeling this will be a great year in blogging if I can devote once a week. I will do my best although I might need you to flood my inbox with messages to keep me going.
This weekend I will try -- I said try -- to find some time to write about some cool happenings over the past year. They are etched in my mind and if I get them down in here I am sure you and the next person will want to bookmark/feed this blog to keep coming back to see what happens next.
Parenting my asperger's child (no longer is Asperger's in the DSM-5 - as it was removed as a disorder and "collapsing" it under the autism spectrum disorders.) is still the main blog - I kind of like keeping it separate and having a name to my son's disorder -- My blog's title just could not be: Parenting my Autistic Spectrum Disorder Child. ha ha.
Some very near future blogs:
Ways I learned to calm my child during a rage in 10 minutes or less
Getting you child involved socially even if he/she has no friends
Introducing new foods
Personal Hygiene (this is still a very hot topic in our household but we are getting there)
High School and the Asperger's Child
How to Get Siblings to Understand
Career Goals beyond High School - start now don't wait
Asperger's - Outside View Looking In ---> My son's blog
Bear with me as I have a feeling this will be a great year in blogging if I can devote once a week. I will do my best although I might need you to flood my inbox with messages to keep me going.
Labels:
asperger's,
aspergers,
autism spectrum disorder,
career goals,
high school,
parenting,
personal hygiene,
rage,
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siblings,
social
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